Uno Bot
by Sweet Kid 2020
Summary: Parody of the Spongebob Squarepants episode "Krab Borg". Numbuhs 3 and 4 are convinced that Numbuh 1 is a robot. I don't own either of these cartoons.


**Hi! It's me again. I hope I'm not annoying you.**

**As you can tell, this is a parody of the Spongebob episode, Krab Borg, which is even mentioned in the story.**

**Shout out to zcross1997, who has written another Spongebob parody titled, "Potty Mouth". I highly recommend reading it.**

**Also, the final scene in this story was inspired by a YouTube comment thread on a clip of that episode. The part where Mr. Krabs yells, "WHAT!? You think I'm a ROBOT?!"**

**Shout out to the awesome dude who helped me create that thread. Thanks, man.**

**On with the show!**

...

**Begin Transmission**

It was just a normal day at the treehouse, but Numbuh 3 felt that things weren't as they seemed.

The previous day, she had watched an episode of Spongebob Squarepants called "Krab Borg", which left her paranoid that robots were nearby.

Suddenly, Bradley, A.K.A Numbuh 6, a cyborg skunk and friend of Sector V, came up behind her while she was eating breakfast.

Seeing Bradley from out of the corner of her eye, she screamed, "ROBOT OH MY GOSH!"

Bradley just smiled at his adoptive mother.

"Oh, it's just you, Bradley."

Then the toaster went off.

"I SURRENDER!" Kuki cried, then turned and saw the toaster, "Oh."

Then Numbuh 4 came in, "Numbuh 3-"

"AAAAAAHH!" Numbuh 3 shrieked, knocking him over. She then noticed him lying on the ground, "Uh, Numbuh 4, what are you doing on the ground?"

"I'm not on the ground," Numbuh 4 replied, standing up, "I'm coming to tell you that Numbuh 1 sent Numbuhs 2 and 5 out to spy on the teenagers, so while he's keeping an ear open, you and I need to look after the treehouse, tidy things up a bit."

"R-right, right. Sorry, Wally, I'm just really really nervous! Yesterday I saw an episode of Spongebob where Mr. Krabs is a robot, and it really freaked me out! Now I keep thinking robots are trying to take over the Earth!"

"Oh, Kuki, you know that's just a cartoon, right? That kind of thing can't really happen!"

"Seriously? We've fought all manner of monsters, evil scientists, and weirdos, but you don't believe robots can take over the Earth?"

"Come on! Let's stop standing around talking about 'Spongeboob' and go clean something, that oughta get your mind off robots."

Numbuh 4 then went into his room to start "cleaning it". Really, he just wanted to go punch stuff.

_I think I'll go check on Numbuh 1 first_, Numbuh 3 thought.

Meanwhile, Numbuh 1 was in his room, keeping one ear on his communicator, the other on his radio, which was playing robot music.

"Aw, I love that song!" Numbuh 1 said as the song ended, picking up his radio, "Come on, little buddy, play it again, please! That song made me feel recharged!"

He didn't realize that Numbuh 3 had witnessed him talking to his radio.

"Why is Numbuh 1 talking to his radio?" Kuki wondered, "And why did he say he felt 'recharged'? If I didn't know better, I'd think he was... _a_ _robot_? Nah!"

Numbuh 3 peeked in as Numbuh one called Numbuh 5 on his communicator.

"Numbuh 1," said Numbuh 5 on the other end, "we're kind of in the middle of a mission here! Besides, the song you're thinking of goes beep boop boop bop beep beep."

"Beep boop boop bop beep beep?" Numbuh 1 replied, trying to get the beeping pattern right, " Not beep boop boop bop beep? Beep? Boop boop bop!

Numbuh 3, frightened, asked herself, "Why's Numbuh 1 making those beeping noises? Could he really be... _a robot_? Nah!"

Numbuh 3 peeked in and panicked when she saw Numbuh 1 dancing like a robot while singing the song that was playing earlier.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

Numbuh 3 ran as fast as her legs could carry her, bursting into Numbuh 4's room.

"Yeah! Take that you cruddy monster!" Numbuh 4 shouted as he got another punch in, "And that! And-"

"WAAAAAAALLYYYYYYYY!"

Numbuh 3 jumped on Numbuh 4, clinging to him.

"Wally! Numbuh 1! Radio! Beeping! _Robots_!"

"Get off me! Now, would you mind telling me what the crud is going on?"

"Numbuh 1 is a robot! I just know it! And I can prove it, too! Spongebob said robots have no sense of humor!_ They can't laugh_! Hey! Numbuh 1! Come in here!"

Numbuh 1 entered the room, looking a bit annoyed, "What do you need?"

"Numbuh 4 just told me this hilarious joke! Tell Numbuh 1 what it was, Wally!"

"Uhhh... errrm... Why couldn't the ten-year-old get into the pirate movie?"

"Why?"

"It was rated 'Arrr'!" Numbuh 4 started laughing, "Get it? 'Cause it's... about... pirates."

"Honestly, you're starting to sound like Numbuh 2! Now, both of you get to cleaning up! Starting in here, it's a pig sty!"

Then, Numbuh 1 left the room.

Numbuh 3 gasped, "_Not even a chuckle_! See, Wally? He _didn't_ laugh because he _couldn't_ laugh because he's _a robot_!"

"Kuki, there's a perfectly 'logistical' reason he didn't laugh! He's obviously heard the joke before! The only reason you think Numbuh 1 is a robot is because you watched that stupid cartoon-"

Numbuh 3 cut him off, "Numbuh 1! Numbuh 1, come back in here! I gotta tell you something!"

Numbuh 1 came back in, groaning, "What now?"

Numbuh 3 pointed at Numbuh 4, her eyes going misty, "Wally's brother never smiled at him! Isn't that sad?"

Numbuh 1 stopped and thought for a moment, "That does sound pretty sad, but babies don't really understand that kind of thing anyway, now get back to work you two!"

Numbuh 1 left the room again.

"It's just like Spongebob said! Robots can't cry, either!"

"Oh, come on, Numbuh 3! This is getting ridiculous! I'll have you know my brother loves me very much!"

"That's the final test! The love test, _robots can't love_!"

"Wait a min-"

"Numbuh 1! Numbuh 1, come back here!"

"_What is it, Kuki_?!" Numbuh 1 snapped as he stormed back in.

"I just wanna tell you that Wally loves you!"

Awkward silence followed.

"_Get back to work you two_!" Numbuh 1 hissed, shooting Numbuh 4 a suspicious look.

Numbuh 3 began freaking out even more as Numbuh 1 stormed out, "_Wally_!"

Numbuh 1 went back to his room, where his radio was still playing music. Suddenly the radio stopped.

"Hm, the batteries must be dead."

He took the batteries out and stuck them in his pocket.

"Now, I'm sure Numbuh 5 wouldn't mind if I had one of her caramel candies. They need salt, though."

Numbuh 1 grabbed a salt shaker, but as he was about to salt the caramels, Numbuh 3 shouted his name again, catching him off guard and making him get salt in this eyes.

"Numbuh 1!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Numbuh 1 screamed, "MY EYES!"

Numbuh 3 continued to call out, "Numbuh 1! Numbuh-"

"Kuki!" Numbuh 4 exclaimed, handgagging her, "Now, listen, what did "Spongeboob" say robots looked like?"

"Well, they have red eyes, batteries, and metal pinchers for hands!"

"Okay, think for a minute. Does Numbuh 1 look anything like that?"

At that moment, Numbuh 1 burst out of his room. Numbuhs 3 and 4 saw his red eyes, the batteries in his pocket, and the metal "pinchers" he'd been using to get the caramels.

"AAAAHHH!" Numbuh 1 screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Numbuhs 3 and 4 screamed, clinging to each other.

Numbuh 1 continued to scream in pain as he rushed into the bathroom

"You evacuate the animals! I'll call the Army!" Numbuh 4 cried, rushing to a phone, "Hello, operator? Get me the Army!"

"Hello," said a voice on the other end, "you have reached the Army's Automated Phone Service."

"KUKI!" Numbuh 4 shrieked, "THE ROBOTS ARE RUNNING THE ARMY!"

"NOT THE ARMY!" Numbuh 3 cried, "ATTENTION, NUMBUH 6, GET THE HAMSTERS OUTTA HERE! THE ROBOTS ARE TAKING OVER THE WORLD!"

There was a beat of silence as Bradley looked at her in confusion.

"_OUR_ WORLD!"

Numbuh 6 and all the hamsters rushed out of the treehouse.

Numbuh 1 emerged from the bathroom as the lights in the treehouse went out, due to the hamsters (the ones who were the power source for their treehouse) being gone. Numbuhs 3 and 4 ducked behind the couch.

Numbuh 1 sighed, "Ah, that feels much better. Beep boop boop bop boop..."

Numbuh 4 turned to Numbuh 3, "We've gotta find out what that robot did with the real Numbuh 1! But how?"

"Well, after Spongebob proves that Mr. Krabs is actually a robot, he teams up with Squiward, and they get the poop on the robot!"

Numbuh 4 looked confused, "They... poop... on the robot?"

"Yeah, you know, they get the straight poop, ask questions, get information."

"I never thought I'd say this, but Numbuh 3, _let's get that poop_!"

When they finally figured out what to do, they set their plan in motion. They found Numbuh 1 near the transmission unit, trying to figure out why it wasn't turning on.

Numbuh 1 groaned, "Great! Just great! Now how am I supposed to get Numbuh 5's report to Global Command?"

He then noticed Numbuhs 3 and 4, "Oh! Hey, guys! Could you give me a hand?"

They shut the door and lock it.

Numbuh 1 let out a nervous laugh, "Why did you lock the door?"

He looked confused, "Why do you have that rope?"

He started freaking out, "Who let the hamsters out? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

**Transmission Interrupted**

**Connection Re-established**

Within seconds, Numbuhs 3 and 4 had Numbuh 1 tied up in a chair.

"Numbuh 3! Numbuh 4!" Numbuh 1 exclaimed, "What is the meaning of this?! Untie me this instant!"

"Shut up!" Numbuh 4 yelled, slapping Numbuh 1.

"Sweet cherry pie!" Numbuh 1 cried, "What the devil is going on?"

"I said shut up you bucket of bolts!" Numbuh 4 slapped Numbuh 1 again.

"I can't take it!" Numbuh 3 cried, running to the corner and beginning to weep.

"Kuki?" Numbuh 4 asked, approaching her with concern.

"Oh, Wally! I just can't stand it! Seeing you slap Numbuh 1 is just too horrible to watch!"

"No, that's not Numbuh 1! That's Robot Numbuh 1!"

"Oh."

"And the only way to deal with these robot types is to find out what they know."

"Right." Numbuh 3 then went up to Numbuh 1 and slapped him.

Numbuh 4 rolled his eyes, "Kuki, you've gotta ask him a question first."

"Oh, right. What color is my underwear?" Numbuh 3 demanded, slapping Numbuh 1 again.

"Let me do it!" Numbuh 4 exclaimed, grabbing a lamp and turning it on, "Where's Numbuh 1?"

Numbuh 1 glared at him, "What are you talking about? _I'm_ Numbuh 1!"

Numbuh 4 slapped him again, "We can do this all day if you want! Where's Numbuh 1?"

"I'm Numbuh 1!"

Numbuh 3 piped up, "Where's Numbuh 1?"

"I'm Numbuh 1!"

Numbuh 4 asked again, "Where's Numbuh 1?"

"_I am Numbuh 1_! I am I am I am I am I am!"

Numbuh 3 stepped back, rubbing her chin, "This is one stubborn robot."

"WHAT?!" Numbuh 1 shouted, "You think I'm a ROBOT?!"

"We don't THINK, we KNOW." Numbuh 4 replied.

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard! I AM NUMBUH 1!"

Numbuh 4 went to Numbuh 3's side, "He's not cracking. We'll never get it out of him this way."

Numbuh 3 snapped her fingers, "I got an idea. Keep an eye on him, Wally. Don't fall for any of his robo tricks."

She then left the room and returned with her hands behind her back, "If Robot Numbuh 1 won't tell is where Numbuh 1 is, maybe one of his little robot friends will."

Numbuh 4 looked confused at the object she held up, "Uh, Kuki, that's a communicator."

"I know, but I heard Numbuh 1 talking to his radio earlier. He calls it his 'little buddy'."

Numbuh 4 looked slyly at Numbuh 1, "Oh really? Put it on the table, Numbuh 3!"

Numbuh 1 rolled his eyes, "Oh come on! You guys are going to interrogate my communicator? You're both crazy!"

Numbuh 4 approached the table, holding up a bat, "We're just gonna see what you're 'little buddy' knows."

Numbuh 1 began to panic, "No, wait! What are you going to do to my communicator!? I got that when I first joined the Kids Next Door!"

Numbuh 4 looked menacingly at the communicator, "Where's Numbuh 1?"

The communicator (obviously) didn't respond.

"Not talking, eh?" Numbuh 4 smashed the communicator into pieces.

Numbuh 1 cried out, "Nooooo! That was the only one I had!"

Numbuh 3 looked at the remains, "I guess it didn't know anything."

"Quick," replied Numbuh 4, "go get something else!"

Numbuh 3 left and returned with a S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R

"No!" Numbuh 1 cried, "Not my S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R! I was given that during basic training!"

Numbuh 4 smashed the S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R. Numbuh 3 then pulled out Numbuh 1's S.P.I.C.E.R.

"I got that for my birthday!"

Numbuh 4 smashed the S.P.I.C.E.R. Numbuh 3 pulled out Numbuh 1's B.A.J.O.O.K.A.

"I- well, actually, I don't know how long I've had that."

Numbuh 4 smashed the B.A.J.O.O.K.A

"Nooo!"

Numbuh 3, brought in Numbuh 1's L.U.N.C.H.B.O.C.K.S. "This is the last robot, Wally."

Numbuh 1 freaked out, "No! Not my L.U.N.C.H.B.O.C.K.S.! I built it myself! Numbuh 2 helped me build it and everything! Nooo!" Numbuh 1 then burst into tears.

Numbuh 4 turned to Numbuh 3, "I thought you said robots couldn't cry."

Numbuh 3 looked sheepish, "I also said they couldn't love."

Numbuh 1 continued to lament, "I loved it more than any other 2x4 gadget!"

Numbuh 3 grinned nervously "Well, at least he's not laughing."

Numbuh 1 cried out, "I remember how I laughed with joy when it was finished!"

Numbuh 4 looked at Numbuh 3, "Um, Kuki, how did that episode you watched end?"

"Huh? Oh, the ending was hilarious! Turns out Mr. Krabs wasn't a robot after all, it was just their... imagination..."

Numbuh 3 let out a nervous chuckle, "Oh! Time to feed the hamsters!" She then ran off.

Numbuh 4 looked at Numbuh 1, laughed nervously, and grabbed a broom.

Numbuh 1 growled loud enough to shake the treehouse, "GRRRRRRRRRR... WAAAALLYYYYYY!"

**End Transmission**

...

**So, what do you think. No flames please.**


End file.
